A Tomb To a View in Mill Valley

Here's another Mill Valley winner. 1006 sq ft, 3 bedrooms, built in 1952. According to the realtor write-up all that has been done to it is a new carpet and a fresh coat of paint; as you can see, no landscaping. $749,000 and you too could be living "the good life" in Marin. Never mind the fact that it is located in one of the worst areas of Tam Valley and is right across from a cemetery. I hear cemeteries make excellent playgrounds for young kids. So this is also a great property to raise your family in. But hey! Anything to live in Marin, right? Besides, everyone knows that house prices in Marin appreciate 20% per year forever. So no worries.

"Upscale" Living in Mill Valley

Just lovely. Well worth the $989,000 asking price. According to the write-up "South facing one level home in move in condition. Light & bright with several skylights. Freshly painted with new capeting and window coverings." I guess "new window coverings" means the venetian blinds that can be seen in all of the photos. Yeah, sure, venetian blinds and paint make this worth every penny.

Novato Bayou

This thing looks like it belongs in the bayou. But anyway, this Novoto PoS is within spitting distance of the 37 highway. The write-up says it is on 29,000 acres (marsh, not swamp) but somehow I think that is not totally accurate as other listings indicate that it is on 0.5 acre which is a bit more reasonable (ok, that was a cheap shot, I admit it). You're on septic here so be careful what and how often you flush. The cinder blocks supporting the house are a nice touch too. It's offered at a laughable $675,000. Pay that and it's yours to raise your kids in. It's so worth it because you can, um, wear your shorts in January while you golf...yeah, that's it...

If Grizzly Adams Lived in Mill Valley...

...then he'd probably live here... ~1000 sq ft of cabin built in 1968. Heck, two bedrooms is more than enough for a mountain man. The write-up says it was remodeled but failed to say when; judging by the pictures of the interior I'm guessing it was last remodeled during the late '70s or maybe early '80s. Asking a pittance really at $725,000 considering it's Marin after all, God's country, where people aren't supposed to care about the house, you know, the place where people are fond of saying 'everyone wants to live here', where you can wear your shorts in January while golfing and driving four to six hours to the slopes. Yeah, right, whatever.

"A Really Junky House" in San Rafael

This San Rafael PoS (built in 1955) just came on the market. At 1512 sq ft. it's average sized by Marin standards. But just look at this thing. Gray, stained exterior paint that matches Marin's typically cloudy and rainy sky this time of year. Cracked and oil stained driveway. And then there is that added "touch of class" -- the lazily coiled garden hose lying on the ground. This thing has no curb appeal at all and screams "I'm too lazy to even paint the exterior or otherwise make this thing look presentable because I fully plan on screwing you, the buyer, for a windfall... ah, ha ha haaa". Also, it used to be a child-care center if you can believe that so you know it's been beat on. Even the realtor write-up admits that it needs "just a little more tlc". Even my young daughter when she first saw this picture said, and I quote, "that looks like a really junky house". So how much for this PoS? A ridiculous $725,000.

Pothead Paradise in Fairfax

946 sq ft Fairfax PoS built in 1955. On a "mostly level" lot with "expansion potential" and a possible "pool site". 'Long on promises, short on living space' should be the motto for this one. Laundry hookups only in the garage (detached), formica counters, and the shower-over-the-tub thing no less. Also comes with "67' of [seasonal] creek frontage" (better have flood insurance). Wow! It's your basic, small, no frills house way out in the boondocks. Come live the perfect Marin PoS lifestyle! It only costs a pittance really at $739,000.

Boring, Nothing-Special Novato PoS

Again, Marin realtors really need to learn how to use their light meters (and check out this one and this one too both of which point out how sometimes something called a "tripod" is necessary). Light meters come with the camera after all and usually when a part comes with something that part is important for some aspect of normal functioning. As a service to Marin County real estate I provide this link for all the light-meter-challenged realtors out there.

But anyway, this boring, nothing-special 1954 house is located dead center in boring, nothing-special Novato. Nothing special has been done to it other than a new coat of paint and a new water heater. The write-up says it has "originally a 2 car garage" which I am guessing means that the garage has been converted down to a capacity of 0-1 cars. Anyway, this yawner will cost you $599,000. Thank goodness it's not $600K or it would be over-priced for sure.